Monday, July 23, 2012

Octomom: Living the Dream

Blowing kisses and killing boners everywhere.
In the spirit of the All American can-do-attitude Nadya Suleman, aka Octomom. has pulled herself up by her stripper heels and gotten herself and her tribe of children off of Welfare! We can all sleep better at night knowing that Octomom has done her part in helping California get out of it's $16 billion deficit by no longer needing hand outs. Between Octomom's nudie pics of her scarred and stretch marked tummy, horrific fap porn (that she emphatically stated she would never do, but, you know, bitch gotta get a manicure) and pole sliding, she has managed to pull in 6 figures already. It goes to show you that Plain Jane girls anywhere in this great land of opportunity can get a hellacious amount of bad plastic surgery, implant her womb with a litter of chirruns and dance her way into Stardom. A place where any ole ho can drive their parents into bankruptcy by living with them and her horde of nose pickers and then move into a half million dollar house that you don't have to pay for and let your kids destroy that shit.
The ever classy and beautiful (hork) Suleman has only been stripping for a couple of weeks now, but apparently has had people throwing fistfuls of dollars at her shimmy and shake. I have to wonder if the highlight of her routine is making the pole completely disappear by hiding it in her clown car lady bits sideways. You know that shit could totally fit after spitting out 14 kids in just 4 pregnancy's without a thought to how she would support them or herself. Her snatch doubles as a blow pop dispenser with so many sticks hanging out her g-string, I imagine it to look like a dozen tampons shoved up there to stem the flood gates of her red flow every time she spreads her hamhocks. One day her little girls are going to look up at their Mommy and be so proud to know that she brought them out of the depths of despair by sexing it up to a curious and no doubt now mentally scared adoring public. Octomom has proven to the world that her latest welfare stint was only temporary as she said. Well done, Ms. Suleman, well done.

Working hard for the money

8 comments:

  1. She kills my boner and I don't even have a dick...

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  2. "I have to wonder if the highlight of her routine is making the pole completely disappear by hiding it in her clown car lady bits sideways."

    OMG LMFAO!!!

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  3. Sweet Lawd have mercy!!
    I had heard about this but had not realize she had already done all this. and BANG! Nem haunts me with 2 photos.
    In the first one...the "bubble bath" one...she looks just like Ernie, singing about his "rubber duckie".
    And the second one.
    Yikes.....
    I have to wonder how she thinks "having or getting" a boyfriend wasn't an option because of her children.
    Yet this was acceptable?
    Can you imagine the "memory" her muscles needed trying to remember?

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    Replies
    1. She supposedly has a boyfriend that's 10 years younger than her. He's a boxer or something.

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    2. OMG, should have added the boyfriends pic. Dude is a body builder and just as gross as her. Yucky fake tan and oily. Vomit inducing.

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    3. The fucking horror!!!

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  4. OMG, why did I scroll down? WHY?

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