Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Piggyback Bandit on the Loose!

Crazy Piggyback guy...
Being a true crime "addict" I have become nearly immune to the moral depravities of society. From an innocent child being slain by her own parents to 260 pounds of neck meat and burnin' love humping her 15 year old son's best friend, this world can be a cruel and bizarre place. The story I'm about to share with you is not as much cruel as it is bizarre. Very bizarre. Sherwin Shayegan, a 28 year old man from Bothwell, Washington, has a disturbing fondness for high school athletes. Dating back to 2008, he has been attending high school sporting events, mainly basketball games, and attempting to get "piggyback rides" from players.
   Shayegan actually dresses up in team uniforms and tries to gain access to players by sitting behind their bench, joining the winning team's celebration on the court, and waiting outside their locker room. He also has attempted to give players massages and hand out towels and water. Shayegan didn't limit his search for "piggyback rides" to just the gymnasium or athletic fields. He has reportedly lured student athletes to the school library under the guise of being a college student writing a term paper. One such incidence in Ellensburg, Washington led to his arrest for sexual assault. According to the student, Shayegan began asking downright creepy questions. He apparently was curious if the male student "looked at other boys in the shower" or ever "sh*t his pants." When the student understandably freaked the fu@k out and attempted to leave the 5'8" 250 pound Shayegan offered to pay for a "piggyback ride" before preceding to yell "time for a piggyback" and jumping on the boy's back.
He's like a hungry tiger, stalking his prey....the elusive, piggyback ride.
  Until last fall, it appears that all his attention was focused on teams in Washington where he has racked up quite an arrest record. Besides the sexual assault charge, he also has been convicted of criminal trespass, vehicle prowling, resisting arrest, and possession of a controlled substance. Records show 16 convictions since 2004 in Washington alone and a whopping 9 open warrants. He has since moved east to Oregon, Montana, North Dakota, and most recently Minnesota. It was in Helena, Montana last October where he racked up his latest arrest. An alert motel clerk noticed something odd about Shayegan(really?) and some of the comments he was making. Police were called, and a plain clothes officer followed him to a local soccer game. There he witnessed Shayegan jump on the back of a player. He was promptly a taken into custody. He pled guilty on February 1st to two misdemeanors assault charges, fined $730, and given a 360 suspended prison sentence. The judge told him he was no longer allowed to attend Montana high school events and that he should "go back to Washington and behave." He didn't listen.
   Just three days later, Shayegan was spotted at a Bismarck, North Dakota basketball game. At a hockey game earlier in the day, he reportedly achieved his goal of a "piggyback ride" from one of the players. This one day " piggyback" search resulted in him being banned from all high schools athletic events in the state of North Dakota. Not to be deterred, Shayegan moved on to the state of Minnesota where he was seen at three basketball games in the span of three days including his only known college game. There he was told by one of the coaches to basically "get the hell away." About time. Minnesota quickly joined Washington, Oregon, Montana, and North Dakota by banning "The Piggyback Bandit" from all high school events.
   There has been no sign of Shayegan since, but he did answer his cell phone on Tuesday, February 14th when contacted by a reporter from the Associated Press. He declined to comment until he could "speak with an attorney first." Although he appeared to be moving east, authorities believe that he may has returned to western Washington. Anyone who sees him is urged to kick his ass, I mean call 911, and report his location. How this guy has not gotten pummeled by a testosterone filled teenager or an angry coach or parent is beyond me. Let's just hope he gets locked up soon. Either way, I can't see this ending well for "The Piggyback Bandit."
 ***Thank you to Missing Budweiser for this awesome write-up.  Right there, baby!


  1. I can't help but like this guy. Sure he looks like that muppet who carries around that TNT detonator and is always blowing shit up...but "piggyback ride time!"? LMAO it's funny, and people just don't get the genius of his physical comedy.

    Good stuff, Bud. Hook us up with more...

  2. Missing BudweiserMarch 1, 2012 at 8:58 AM

    My mom said basically the same thing when I directed her to the story. She said he seems "harmless but weird." I think this guy may be making a slow progression to something alot worse. While I do find it hilarious that he would interview a student and ask him if he ever "shit his pants", you have to admit that is very disturbing. He probably needs to be confined to a mental institution rather than prison.

    1. He will be sitting in one of them soon enough, Bud. Just give it time, give it time.

  3. LOL! When he tries to get piggy back rides, and - jumps on, I can't imagine the person he jumps on can physically hold him up (he looks like a piggy himself). They must fall down, no? Omg, I'm sorry, I know what he's doing is WRONG, but LOL.

    Thanks for adding his picture today (unless I missed it yesterday). I can't understand how no one (especially a parent) hasn't attacked him YET.

    1. I think there's def an element of WTF and a buckle of the knees...maybe even a fall or two. And YES it's weird and the questions he asks these players are totally inappropriate, but most athletes these kids age hear crazy shit and aren't little guys...I think they can handle a bat-shit crazy man looking for some piggybackin'...this just makes me giggle and shit. If he goes on to slappin balls and stuff then I will no longer lol at his actions and remember him when he was just the piggyback dude. *sigh

  4. I'm gonna agree with Bud on this one...this guy seems like a sick fuck rapey bastard that's keeping his molesty tendencies in check by getting his jollies in back riding form...It doesn't seem like a sexual thing at first, when you hear about a dude jumping on someone's back for a, wait, yeah it does...but what I'm saying is, look at who he targets and how frequently it happens...this dude is doing it for some kind of sexual thrill that's keeping a nastier, penis involved assault at bay.

  5. W. T. F?!?

    (chinzy nylon athletic garb aside)
    On WHAT highschool field/gymnasium floor would this greasy, portly, TROLL pass for 'one of the kids'??

    And, this clever "disguise" has allowed him to get close enough to openly assault boys at games?

    Time to put down the cell phones, people, if you are so *distracted* that you are mistaking Danny Devito's ugly twin brother for a 16 year old soccer player.
    Just sayin'!!