Sunday, March 4, 2012

This Is The Ultimate...In Gay

Dakota Cochrane. Dicking ass and taking names.
If you're a fan of the UFC like I am, by now you probably know that this upcoming season of the Ultimate Fighter has a contestant with a past in butt piracy. Dakota Cochrane is getting his ground game ready and going from gay-for-pay to rear naked chokes. Okay, that may sound gay, but it's a real submission in mixed martial arts, not a term for choke out butt sex.
The word on the web is that Cochrane has been in more than 16 homosexual adult films and left the industry at his girlfriend's urging. Some may say, "Girlfriend? Yeah, right" with a roll of their eyes and a scoff, but supposedly the guy was hard up for cash and we all have to make a living. In Cochrane's words,

"It's definitely a decision I regret. If I would have known what would happen I definitely wouldn't have done it. But I had money issues and I needed help. I went there to do pictures, and they started throwing pretty high numbers in front of me. I didn't really think. It was a big mistake."

I'm going to have to invoke a verse from the almighty Diff'rent Strokes theme song here. "Now, the world don't move to the beat of just one drum, what might be right for you, may not be right for some." Wise Words.
Anyone in the mood for a sandwich?
The stuff this guy did in porn, I think he's earned his pay for playing gay and it may make some guys in the Ultimate Fighter House uncomfortable if he actually wins his fight to get in the house this season ("Is that your cup or are you just happy to see me?"), but it's not really that big of a deal. Even if this guy were a total flamer, it's not automatically guaranteed he'd be attracted to any of the guy's in the house. Gays are as selective as the rest of us. I like cock, but not every cock and I have my type. Gays are the same way, they don't want every guy with a dick. Don't flatter yourselves, straight fellas.
The UFC has gotten shit in the past, being called homophobic and what not, but I really don't think that's the case. Also, this guy is saying he's not actually gay, he did it for the money and he was upfront about his dillying and being diddled by dudes. This could also just be a stunt for this guy to get more exposure for himself, just another douche trying to get on TV. We won't really know until the season starts and we see some grounding and pounding and what this guy is really made of. Trust me, if you've watched any seasons of The Ultimate Fighter, you know almost right off the bat who's in it because they want to be a fucking fighter and who's there just to dick around. Only time will tell.
Even Dana White, President of the UFC, seems to be A-O-Fucking-Kay with an ex-knob gobbler joining the ranks. Just last October he said, "I'll tell you right now, if there was a gay fighter in UFC, I wish he would come out. I could care less if there's a gay fighter in the UFC. There probably is and there's probably more than one." 
President of the UFC, Dana White. Does this guy look like a homophobe to you? I think not. He's a total bear.
I'm pretty damn sure there's more than a few too and it would be stellar if they'd come out. Yeah, Nick Ring, I have you in mind when I say that. You can't really blame the UFC for gays not wanting to come out in a sport where you have men all over other men, in very awkward positions, grabbing all over. It's a more...intimate, for lack of a better word...sport than football or basketball and seriously, when's the last time someone came out of the closet in either of those sports? I don't think the UFC deserves all the shit they get when their's isn't the only sport that makes in difficult to Live Out Loud and be Queer and Proud. But they're making progress.

I'm sure there will be some people in the organization that will have a problem with it, but if they're honestly that uncomfortable with it, they have issues of their own to figure out...or have been growing up in the Hallelujah world of All Gays Go To Hell. There will be snide remarks and shitty comments, but what will they say when the guy who was taking cock for a living beats them? More of the same? Maybe this guy will earn some respect and shut people up. And not just with his cock either.
So remember, guys, not all gays are hungry for your man meat...but guard your buttholes just in case...just kidding. Your asses are safe.

32 comments:

  1. I hear ya, Booski...werd.

    Thing is, I hear guys say they would never fuck another dude for cash. But that's what they say...I don't see a straight dude ever admitting they would go against their most manly instincts and take an ass-pounding cause of money problems. But I think if they were between a rock and a hard cock....they totally would. The Diff Strokes theme song has basically been words I live by...good call.

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  2. Missing BudweiserMarch 4, 2012 at 1:08 PM

    It's one thing to fuck or suck a dude for money. It's another to do it on camera for the entire world to see for the rest of your life. I have to wonder about him playing the "broke" card too. Aren't a majority of young college students "poor" to some degree? Sounds like an excuse to get paid doing something he enjoyed. I hope this faggot gets his ass kicked next Friday, but I don't see that happening. He is a tough kid and talented fighter. Should be and interesting season of TUF.

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  3. Chicks fuck and suck dudes off for money on camera and go on to other less scandalous careers. What seems to be bothering you is that he crossed over to the pooper shooter side, instead of nailing worn out pussies. Gay porn pays a lot better than straight if you're a dude and yeah, there are "broke students" or broke people in general that don't "stoop" to fucking for cash, the difference is what you're willing to do for cash and your personal values. And being gay isn't just about taking a dick to the brown eye or swallowing another guys baby batter. The guys MMA record is 10-2 or some shit, so maybe he is serious about being a fighter and may be TUF enough. I saw some of what he was taking up his bunghole...so if he's even half the trooper his asshole is, I think he may have a future as a fighter.

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    1. Missing BudweiserMarch 5, 2012 at 3:42 AM

      Did you actually watch his videos? And if you swallow another dude's load or take his cock up your ass, you are GAY or at least bi-sexual.

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    2. Can you post pictures of what he was taking or at least give me a description?

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    3. CT, in regards to what Cochrane crammed in his can, for once, I went tame in the pic department. Just google the guy with the safe search off. Bud, have we met? Of course I watched. Obviously, the guy has had some practice in the pooper poking department 'cause he takes a dick like a champ and I imagine it takes some time to get the anus loosened up enough to slam some massive meat up it...but again, there's more to being gay than just the sex. Women carpet munch on camera for cash and a majority of the time, when they say they aren't lesbian, people accept it without the assholery. We're more used to women playing gay, the whole fantasy of two chicks at the same time it conjures up for guys, so it's not the taboo man on man is...but it is the exact same thing and they don't get nearly the amount of shit a guy does for putting the money shot where his mouth is.

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    4. Good point, Boo. I hadn't really thought of it that way but there is a double standard. Probably because porn is still viewed as a male dominant industry with men being the bigger consumers. I don't mind porn but I've found that its hot chicks with mediocre guys with big dicks. I can only see so many greasy guys with a pony tail with a chick who would be viewed by most as a "9" get banged before I's prefer to watch CSI or fill in the blank with -- what is the other crime scene show the old broads on TCR prefer?

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    5. Missing BudweiserMarch 5, 2012 at 3:35 PM

      Boo- You paid to watch those videos? I did see a still shot of his bung hole, and it did look wrecked. BTW, it isn't all guys fantasy to see two chicks carpet munching.

      CT- Not sure what porn you're watching, but I wouldn't score most the women 9's. What are you talking about with the CSI comment?

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    6. So fucking what if his asshole is torn to shit? You're bigger problem is that guy did some gay shit, not that he might just be a fame whore using the UFC for some extra exposure and took the place of a legitimate fighter in getting into the house. No shit, not all guys want two chicks at the same time? I'm fucking flabbergasted. Deidrich Bader must have alternate plan for that million dollars then. I'm well aware not every dude wants a double team supreme, but obviously there's a market for it and lesbian porn is more for a dude's pleasure than it is for a chick's. But that wasn't the point. CT got what I was saying, so I guess it just went over your head. There is an obvious double standard when it comes to gay for pay with men and women. A guy does it and he is absolutely gay whether he says he is or not. A woman does it and if she says she's not gay, it's just accepted at face value and she doesn't get the ridicule. You might not buy his excuse that he did it for the money, but that's the story he's sticking to and I actually think it's believable. Selling your genitals is a lazy and fast way to make some cash. So is fighting. So it makes sense he'd go from fucking for money to fighting if his girlfriend wanted him out of gay porn. You've watched TUF, you know a lot of these guys are doing it for a quick paycheck. Because 15 minutes in the octogon is a fast payout and they have all the time in the world to train and dick around between fights and they really just don't want to work. That's not true of all fighters, but of some of these up and coming wannabes, it is.

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    7. Bud - the CSI thing was a joke. Back in the days of TCR some of the geriatric crew would talk about watching crime shows a lot. Maybe it was Law and Order? Though if I have to explain it - it obviously was not a very good joke.

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  4. "It's definitely a decision I regret."

    Yep, hindsight is 20/20. To me, it doesn't matter how far behind he was on his rent, how deep in arrears his bills were, or how many creditors were pounding on his backdoor... doing gay porn was asinine.

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    1. Missing BudweiserMarch 5, 2012 at 3:34 AM

      I totally agree. Like what you did there with "pounding on his backdoor" and "asinine."

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    2. "deep in arREARS" to be more precise.

      I have been sent by ICANN to test Shannie and Boo's policies on bad puns. ...and I take my role seriously.

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    3. Very nice. It's good to know you take your job seriously. BTW, ass play should always be taken seriously. ALWAYS

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    4. Missing BudweiserMarch 5, 2012 at 10:44 AM

      Damn it! How did I miss "deep in arrears"?

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    5. Our policy on puns goes as follows...

      It better be super lame, and it better make at least one of us lol.

      "Deep in arRears"... I believe is our first pun on this fucking awesome, piece of shit blog. Congrats on that Knipton, you win a gift certificate to Applebees. It's only for $12.00 and it expires tomorrow. So live it up Puniption...and don't thank us...we thank you.

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    6. We have a policy? I thought so long as you don't spam us with geriatric cyber sex, everything else was A-Okay...

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    7. LOL..our policy is too make people as uncomfortable as possible. That said, fuck the Po-licy... We should just stick with what we do best.

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    8. Is too??? lol, fuck me. I'm still in a delirious state.

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    9. Losing 15 lbs out the tailpipe in 24 hours will do that to a person.

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    10. Hey, at least I wasn't taking 15lbs to the tailpipe.

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  5. I'm gonna ask a question, and it may sound stupid, but...Does anyone here think that this sounds like hype to just get ratings up for the show? I always think there is a sneaky way in show biz that makes me believe that this guy was picked to be on the show and fight just for buzz and shit to get ratings up.

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  6. Applebees GC?!?!?! Fuck yeah! I'll be by in like 3 hours to pick it up!

    ...and, generally, if something doesn't drive me to write some absolutely maniacal dissertation, I leave some comment that I - and usually only I - think is funny. I will try to be more inclusive here, though.

    That said... I think that Boo's article brings great points of gender inequity - or differences anyway. I certainly never considered it.

    If some broad is sucking on another broad and says she did it for the money, meh. 'course she did. In fact, I think that she did it special for me! But a guy taking up the pooper?!? Every one of us heterosexual males asked if we would do it would say "Not for a million bucks!"

    But(t), like everything, there is an underlying continuum. Hiding in the fraternity are the secret gays or bis that wouldn't give a crap because they would be into it anyway and - more alarmingly to the hardcore hets/homophobes - are the true heteros that value money more than cum-stained teeth who are willing to put their het-ways on the shelf for a day to pitch and catch in the G-league.

    We fear them. If knowledge of them gets out, it will warp the minds of our children and weaken the resolve of our allies. (I love that line!)

    The discussion also brought to light the fact that - in addition to most hetero porn being for men - most lesbian porn is for men, most gay porn is for men, and - in fact - most goat porn is for men. That is because, although the male gender's belief that we control the real world is a fragile fantasy maintained for the sole purpose of protecting our delicate egos, we truly do control the porn world. Ron Jeremy made it so. ...and as he gets older and fatter and flaccid... er. ...please don't take that away from us.

    Have I mentioned that I sometimes write maniacal dissertations?

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  7. But it's chock-full of protein...so if you're watching carbs no worries about swallowing...

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    1. You amaze me with your knowledge of nutrition.

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    2. I amaze me in general...am I allowed to be cocky if I don't swing a dick?

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  8. I like the manical disserations, but I have to wonder just how many men would do the "gay for pay" thing? It seems like simple math when it comes down to the oldest profession (let's face it, porn is prostitution), women with a vagina can get a guy a pay them for a slice and get a guy to pay two chicks, to take the train to Dykeville. But when you put a man in that situation, it becomes a whole new type of monster gayness. Boo made a great reference, fighting is easy money, worst thing to happen is you get hurt. Same with gay porn, easy money and worst thing that can happen is you need some eye-rinse, and the leather cheerio gets some roughing up. The guys that do the gay for pay shit, are prob the same dudes who will eat anything on a dare for 10 bucks...
    Oh and Kniption, your GC is ready for pick up whenever, I gave it to a guy named Karl Hungus, he'll give it you whenever you want. :)

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    1. Ya like that line? "Woman with a vagina"? WTF ?lol

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  9. "The guys that do the gay for pay shit, are prob the same dudes who will eat anything on a dare for 10 bucks..."

    That's a succinct way to say it. I don't know that the percentage of heteros that would do gay for pay is huge, but there is always someone willing to do something for cash.

    The other thing that this reminds me of is...

    I once read a study about people who were interviewed right after being mugged. Oddly, the comments of the victims ranged between two clear camps.

    Camp #1 - These people said "I lost all my money, but it's okay... I didn't get beat up."

    Camp #2 - These people said "I got the crap beat out of me, but it's okay... They didn't get my money."

    According to the researchers, people have a view of themselves that ranges from very internal to very external. The internal people put self before money and the external people put money before self.

    So... Camp #2 - the people that took a beating rather than give up their precious $38 - are basically the ones takin' it up the pipe. That's part of the reason why - in the back of your mind - you are thinking that Camp #2 would make a great name for a gay porn flick. It's amazing how it all comes full circle.

    Unrelated... You gave my Applebee's gift certificate to Karl Hungus?!? You mean Karl Hungus your cable guy?!?

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    1. Oh he hooked up your cable too? Small world.


      "Camp #2" does lend itself to a meat lovers porn. It's the circle of life.

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